Robert borrowed my car tonight to move his stuff into his new flat. Before he took the car I had to empty out a box full of old (1990’s) work diaries that I had left in the back of the car after I did a last scout around the house for anything I’d left behind.
I thought it would be fun to show them to Ginger, and it was, until I was stopped dead in my tracks as I discovered a personal diary I had written off as lost forever. I knew that in it was my first rambling attempts to describe what was wrong with my marriage. Something I’d told Ginger, and others about but had never been able to find until now.
It was a very emotional read, and I’ve not yet re-read the whole thing. What it did do, was bring home to me how even in 1990 I wanted to finish my marriage, but didn’t have the courage to do so. It also showed how I wished for a partner to share my life with, and not just someone to raise kids with.
And there on the eighth of October 1990, was a frightening precursor to the financial mess I now find myself in.
